Today I got the news I have known would eventually come....Dawson needs surgery. When Dawson was just over 2 years old, we found out he had a Chiari Malformation. In layman's terms, his brain stem herniated through an opening at the base of his skull and is compressing his spinal cord. Thankfully, we see a phenomenal neurosurgeon that has been watching Dawson since 2006 and waiting for the benefits of surgery to outweigh the risks. We are there. Dawson has now developed a cyst on his spinal cord from the lack of spinal fluid flowing and if we don't do anything, there can be long term damage up to paralysis.
The craziest part about today is that I was alone when I got the news. When Dawson first started getting his MRIs, James and I went together. They take about 4 hours each time and it was worrisome. As we got use to the feelings, I started taking him alone and James stayed with Colton so he didn't always feel like he was being shuffled. But, we have always gone to the follow up appointment together. It is better for us both to hear the information so we can bounce our questions off each other when we get home. Well this year, the day our appointment was scheduled, the doctors office called and had to reschedule. The only day available before school started was today. A day James was on shift. I told him that I had a feeling I would get some sort of big news since he wouldn't be there. You know what they say about a mother's intuition...
So here I am now. Numb, scared, questioning and yet thankful and confident. It is a very strange combination of emotions and I am sure it is only the beginning.
